It’s never easy

Somewhere in July, I received a message through Facebook concerning my family’s misfortune. In that message, I was asked on my experience, overcoming the traumatic tragedy because they also experience the lost of their family members. I did a little search on the net and found an article dated 25 June 2010 where a couple was drowned while they were on vacation in Langkawi, leaving behind their 2 year old son. I was told that the whole family members have to undergo professional therapy for Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, and some are on medication.

How do my family overcome this? It’s hard to tell actually as each individual have a very different way of dealing with emotional trauma. To tell the truth, it’s not as easy as it looks. You can never be prepared with this sort of thing. Losing one family member is already traumatic enough, let alone more. Nothing is easy when you’re dealing with the lost of loves one. There is no shortcut to it. No matter what you do, every memory you have of them will definitely bring you to tears, as nothing would be the same without them. It took me about two years to fully recovered from the lost of my fiancée. So would it take me another year or two again with the lost of my family? Only time can tell.

I would still be considered lucky because I still have my dad and brothers, my cousins still have their parent and siblings but the most hard hit would be my cousin Ahnaf because he had lost both his parents, sisters and little brother. He is left alone. All he has now for parents is his uncles and aunties, all he has for his siblings is us cousins. Now he is the youngest; he’s just 12, and we all have to chip in to ensure that he would turn out to be a good man, and have a good future. I guess this would be the answer to the question at hand, how do we cope. We cope by having each other even closer.

So this would be our first year of Aidilfitri without them and I know it will be different, and we will try not to shed any more tears except for tears of joy and laughter. Although I looked or seem fine by people around me, at times I do cry, every time in my car while I’m driving, at the mosque, teary eye at the thought and smell of my mom’s Kuih Makmur; to which a lot of my friends says the best they ever tasted, listening to song which my sisters used to sing to. OK I’m laying off from eating Kuih Makmur until further notice :p .

To the families of late Yuhin Azlan Yusof & Norita Dahari, you have to stick together, more tightly than ever, because they have entrusted you their legacy, a very young man, to be a good man, just like his father. I wish you a blessed Aidilfitri, I know there will be tears flowing, but make it a happy tears as we still have a long journey ahead of us.

To everyone, Selamat Aidilfitri, Maaf Zahir & Batin

It’s funny that the more we try to not remember, the more will remember it, but the more we think of it, the more we slowly forget about it. Something to ponder 🙂

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